Manic Pixie Dream God

by Nisa Lee

The colourless boy smiles
like a gentleman
at a prayer altar; I kneel him
down as he begs
for thrill he never knew
he needed. A girl like me
is a candied-dream stuck
toothsome in the fantasy
he swears is gospel; my perky lips
part just wide enough for
him to kiss but never enough for me
to speak, and good lord
I love him forever, fever-sick.
For him, I dye
my hair wild in cool girl blue
so that he might find something
holy in its hue, he comes
to me with stuffed-shirt
predictability but I won’t ever
change his clothes,
just show him a different way
to dress, and he’ll revere me for that
respectable skirt, and my
irreverent style —
he’ll build me a shrine
with promises that shine
of devotion only to me,
but like any other god
I’ll be gracious
enough to leave
once he gets what he needs.

Nisa Lee is a Malaysian poet, editor, and author of her debut poetry collection Dreams, Delusions, and Made Decisions. Her poetry has been featured in Nine Muses Review and is anticipated in the upcoming issue of HaluHalo Journal. Beyond the page, Nisa advocates for mental health while risking her own at her day job teaching 6-year-olds how to read. You can find her on Instagram at @nrhanisarz.