The Lord's Mom sat Him down to teach Him how to prevent Him from leaving a smaller version of Himself behind. Using a police nightstick, She rolled the condom down it. You won't be this big, She said before She caught herself saying it.
What if I want a smaller version of myself?
The Lord's Mom handed Him the nightstick and an unwrapped condom: show me what you've learned.
J. Bradley is the author of the forthcoming flash fiction collection Neil & Other Stories (Whiskey Tit Books, 2018). He lives at jbradleywrites.com.